So,my bad for not keeping up the notables this week. But not much has happened. My days end at 4:30am and start again at 1pm, and i really dont eat until 5pm. Then i do a couple things, watch Nip/Tuck, play some video games, then enter gay chat rooms and try to find new friends.
Heres whats been going on in my life:
1) Yes, I still need to write that SA article i posted about. Im getting on it, k? Right now ive been enjoying discussing it with my family and friends, and getting their feedback. Man, I love this field.
2) Ive been logging into gay chat rooms (not Manhunt, thank you very much) and trying to find new gay males to connect with. For me, gay friends have always been exciting (think "Ohh Shiny!"). So one of my goals now that im closer to a metropolitan area is to make new gay friends. Im so determined. And so far I have made 4. A new gay friend every night, except for one night where I made 2 in one night. No hang out dates yet, but i'll get there. baby steps.
3) Ive gotten paid and got my car washed. Oh so shiny. Loves it.
4) Ive been getting reacquainted with Boulder, and its NOT the town I once knew. Good god no. Its full of rich snobs with too much money that all walk around with a sense of entitlement like they are better than everyone. Another words, I see too much of the worst side of myself, and its like a freaking reflection everywhere, because I know it wasnt all that long ago when i walked around Eugene with the same sense of self-satisfaction.
But this is over drive. I mean its like someone let the bros of fraternities and the sassies of sororities and exploded them all over CU campus and all over town. In Eugene, we had a place for people like that. We called it Taylors. But here in Boulder, they are EVERYWHERE! And im trying SO HARD not to feel hatred in my heart. So difficult.
And all I keep asking myself is why. Why do I feel this way? Is it because I grew up in this town and feel a sense of loss at what its become? Is it because I see so much of my former self in these people? Is it because I know I would never fit in? Is it because I can imagine what a pain these students would be to work with professionally? Whatever the reason, Im so sick of it. Its part of the reason I dont venture out to town too much. Imagine everyone looking nice everywhere you go. Everyone in a polo or a dress shirt or some sort of high end fashion. Its endless. Its an endless bubble. Oy.
5) I had lunch with an Orgeon friend who went to high school with me as well, and is also back in town. We got to discuss what has changed in town, and what we miss about Eugene. Shes really neat and we are going to the gay clubs tomorrow, which im excited for.
6) I went to the bars tonight with an old high school friend. He agreed with me completely about the Boulder scene, and even though I like my thoughts to be validated, its not really what I wanted to hear. I wanted to hear a solution, not an agreement that there is a problem.
7) Im thinking of becoming an LGBTQ resource counselor at my Mom's school. Shes the assistant principle at a 2nd chance high school for at-risk youth. All kids who are involved legally, and many of whom were court ordered to be there. Id love the opportunity, as well as Id love to get out of Boulder until I get a job.
8) I have friends who work in retail at Apple, and they are both trying to get me a job, and im trying not to be impatient. But you know me. A week without a job is a week too long. Im dying to get back into a routine. Yes. I like staying up late. But then my life feels..... like a void. All there is is time.... lots and lots of time. Not good for me. I need to stay busy. Thats also why im going to work with my Mom. Even if only for a month or so, I need something to do. And I think being the LGBTQ resource counselor for at-risk youth is something good.
Ok, there are your notables for this week. Blog on hiatus right now. Once I have my schedule back, aka a real job, Ill get back to posting more often.
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